The good news about social anxiety
It is a cruel fact that social anxiety is a self-perpetuating condition, and the fear of social situations and interactions is the fuel for even greater social anxiety.
Before a social event, or when you have to perform in front of others, your heart might start racing, your mouth becomes dry and your palms sweaty. You might even feel dizzy and have to run to the toilet - again. So, you try to avoid feeling so awful and afraid by starting to avoid social situations. In the short term, this works, you feel calmer, and not so harassed.
But then things get even harder, and you ask yourself what is wrong with you, and why you can’t seem to do what everyone around you seems to achieve so easily. Your self-confidence plummets along with the routine of regular interactions and it gets harder and harder to interact with others. These feelings of failure can lead to loneliness, hopelessness, and depression.
You aren’t alone in this. It’s estimated that around 7% of the population experienced social anxiety last year, with a lifetime occurrence of 12% (www.nimh.nih.gov/health/statistics/social-anxiety-disorder). But while the numbers are huge and the symptoms scary, there is good news: social anxiety is highly treatable.
Therapy can help you find out where your social anxiety stems from. It can help you look at your life, your relationships, and your worries in a new way. It can teach you new ways of relating to your worries and to cope with insecurities. A good therapist will help you to find new and better ways of relating to your emotions and thoughts, so they don’t rule you or limit your activities. The aim shouldn’t just be to get you to feel less anxious. Or maybe to feel the way you did before the pandemic and its lockdowns. Coming to therapy because of social anxiety allows you to create a new, strong, and healthy relationship with yourself, and to let you reach into the world and joyfully participate in society on your own terms.
Please know that when you contact me, I will meet you with warmth and acceptance. My practice is a non-judgemental place, and I aim to create a safe space for you, so you have the freedom to explore, learn and grow. If this sounds like something you would like to explore, do contact me for a free 15-minute chat.
